forty.seven.

everyone talks about online articles and blog sites and such, and i just have never gotten into them.
ok, maybe not everyone. but a lot of people.
i'm a fool when it comes to internet and searching and finding good things.
i had to do research for my advanced comp class and i just wanted to cry/die because i'm just not very skilled when it comes to internet research.
i have several blogs i check regularly.
i don't even know how to do that feed thing. i'd like to figure it out, so that i didn't have to stalk around to see when bloggers have updated, it would just show up all nice and convenient for me.

lately i've been paranoid about the radiation that comes from laptops/cellphones.

school has begun and it's crazy and busy and wonderful. my advanced composition teacher is TOUGH and expects me to know everything ever but i don't so i hope he doesn't fail me. sometimes i think i'm smart, and then i take classes like this and realize that i know very little, at least i know very little of what this guy knows.
quote: "and yeah, i'll admit, einstein was a pretty smart guy."
my teacher is so smart that he speaks of einstein with a casual air, and only gives him the credit of being "pretty" smart.
my teacher is a little pompous too. he's a dr.
he intimidates me, and also reminds me very strongly of a future version of my friend. which sheds some light on many things. which helps me to not be intimidated, because i feel like i know where he began, the kind of guy he started off as.

acting class is exciting. it's very exciting. i haven't done this in a while. i feel almost giddy. it's acting class, and then we also have weekly journal entries to turn in. i'm sorry, but does it get a whole lot better? i'm actually earning credit for this.

modern dance class is fantastic. i'm actually earning credit for learning to dance... although this credit does not actually go towards any real degree or certificate. honestly, it's just never been my top priority to get my degree or certification in something. i just want to do what i love to do, take classes in things that i want to learn more about and be better at. is that wrong?

school always make my head spin & i like it.
i'm listening to damien rice & i like his music.
i smelled perfume inspired by ireland today & it was strange & bittersweet. it didn't smell like ireland, it smelled familiar. i don't think ireland should smell familiar, at least not like that.

i read some old journal entries from about a year ago [real journal entries, not like blog/xanga entires]. haha, i was so lost. there are many recurring phrases: i just don't know, i'm so confused, i don't understand. then, slowly, there's clarity and understanding and peace and reason.
& now, here i am. it's funny how things change, hm? i like that i don't end up where i always intend, that i can never really predict where i'm going to be, that there's a bigger plan than mine.
right here is somewhere great. i like being on this side. i like waiting. i hope i hope i hope i hope i hope i'm right.

i put finding neverland [the movie] on the ipod. it's hanging out with braveheart and various dances and, randomly, 10 things i hate about you.
i love finding neverland. i cry every time.
i think i'm going to play the finding neverland soundtrack on repeat at my wedding.

visited irish days today.
some of it was good.
some of it i didn't like.
it's IRELAND for crying out loud.
the best place in the world.
& people make stupid t-shirts and pins and commercialize it.
which is just loads of poop.
[in my opinion.]
i'll just keep my ireland in my head then.
o, but i wish you could see it.
i wish i could touch it, really.

it's late. tomorrow i have a day off, but not really because i have to choreograph and paint some. i have to choreograph a whole bunch.
goodnight.
listen to damien rice sometime.

-christina